December 2006 posts

December 30

How Revolutionaries are Born

One of my friends emailed me recently and stated he thought I was becoming quite the revolutionary, now having lost my job twice in the same year on account of my dissent of unethical practices. It reminded me that I had the inkling of a thought the other day about how these situations can either serve to weaken an individual or to strengthen him or her. It is how revolutionaries seem to be born.

When I think about people that led revolutions or led nations to greatness of some kind, their success was often not the result of prior successes in life. By example, Paris Hilton, I believe, will never be a revolutionary. She will make headlines, but she will not bring about significant change to any society, especially not at the paradigmatic level, which is often the result or the cause of a revolution. The status quo is what keeps her going; if society were different, especially economically, all her money might not be available--and what kind of life would that be for a princess? I think more of people like Lenin, Hitler, Guevara, Castro, and Marx, Mandela, and even someone like Paul in the Bible. Many of these types of people wrote a significant number of their works while in prison, being persecuted for the things they believed in. It's not to say that all their beliefs were necessarily good ones, but the point is that their beliefs were a minority view, and because they were bold enough to stand against the majority, they were persecuted.

As I stated before, that persecution either weakens or strengthens the individual. For some, it weakens the spirit and the mind, and they just give up. For others, they realise that they haven't anything else to lose, so their fire is fueled instead. I feel that I have become the latter. Even thinking back to my job in Mexico, there were unethical practices going on there too, and those of us that questioned it were given a very rough time. My only job where I haven't faced this problem is when I worked for the government. That was a good job! Anyways, the more these things happen, the more I want to stand up for what's right. I am not an apathetic Canadian. I care about all kinds of social issues. It's not to say that others don't care, necessarily, but what are they willing to sacrifice to stand up and defend what they care about?

The fact is that, whether people like it or not, there are absolutes in this world. Not all truth is relative; not all morals are relative. There is no circumstance I can think of under which rape is right, for example. It's simply wrong. Am I to be persecuted if I raise my voice to state my belief that rape is wrong? It is not to say that people cannot be forgiven or pardoned ever, but the act in and of itself is still not right.

The trick is being able to choose your battles, to know if you should fight them, when to fight them, and what way to fight them. Much wisdom is required. And each battle will be confounded by the people involved in them. You, as a person, are only one inconsistent figure in the equation. The more people involved, the more confounded the situation. We, as in individuals, are limited by our own humanity, and I believe it is difficult to be able to trust that we will do and say what's expected or what we would even like to do 100% of the time. We become our own unknown variable. That is why I believe so much caution, calculation, and wisdom are required. In any case, some of the revolutionaries I listed above chose physical battles, overthrowing the government and what have you. That is usually not necessary. The wise revolutionary will question the battle first and then use what seems to be the most effective method to fight the battle, if it is worth fighting at all. I am a revolutionary, I hope that I learn to choose my battles well and how I fight them wisely.

What I do know is this: My abnormal psych prof began the class with a discussion about what constitutes abnormality to begin with. Indeed, the definition of that has changed over the years, but one thing in particular he said has really stuck with me since I heard it. He said that we think of abnormal people as people that have something wrong with them, some genetic mutation, mental disability, brain damage or whatever. Sometimes, it's just a person that doesn't fit into the mainstream of society in the way they think and act (think "Nutty Professor" here). It's not to say that the person is bad or wrong, but we sometimes think of them that way anyways. My prof used this analogy: Think of people in society as moving in one direction as a stream, rushing in some areas, bubbling along in others, but they always go the same direction. Then there's one guy pushing against them going upstream, pushing through the pressure and trying to go the opposite direction. What all the other people don't know is that they're headed toward a cliff and are going to fall off and die. It's only that one guy that will live because he's going the right way. (This analogy assumes that self-preservation is important to you). So the prof said, maybe what we think of as abnormal is just one eccentric guy that's willing to go against everyone to do what he knows is right. Since that time, I've wanted to be that guy. Whether it's speaking on behalf of those whose voices have been stolen from them or teaching or doing motivational speaking, I hope that I will always defend my integrity and the principles on which it is based. If I keep losing my job for that, then at least I know it's for the right cause. I want to be a quiet diligent worker, but I also don't want to turn a blind eye to something that may be wrong. I want to find out if reality matches my perception, and then do something to bring about change if possible. If I am a revolutionary, you are witnessing the story of my birth.

1:52 PM | Read comments (1) | Permalink | Philosophy

December 28

More Reasons to Hate Advertising

One day when I was at the gym a couple of weeks before Christmas, I was watching the TV screens while on the treadmill. I am critical enough about advertising as it is, but this one ad came on that really alarmed me. The commercial shows all these kids opening Christmas presents and hating them; one kid throws a tantrum, while another kid simply throws his gift off the side of a cliff, and another pulls the tree down whereas another one jumps all over his to crush it. All the kids react in some extreme way--something I would have been spanked for as a kid--and I thought maybe it was an ad for this show that TLC was having where they take these kids having tantrums about Christmas and get them in shape before they pull the tree down. I was sorely mistaken. The ad was for some type of store, a department store or something, saying, "Make sure you get the right gift this Christmas. Shop at X." It's not that the ad was in poor taste, but in our current generation of entitlement, parents are already giving in to their kids too much as it is, and here, this ad is playing into that poor parenting technique. Why allow these kids to throw tantrums, not to be thankful for the superfluous wealth they already have? Parents have enough trouble as it is disciplining their kids, and now we have the media trying to influence our minds by allowing us to think it's ok to give in to our our kids when they're greedy and selfish. This is certainly the true meaning of Christmas. I guess most people I know are not so duped by advertising, but I hope that most people do look at them critically so that we aren't influenced by such a shameful gimmick.

7:18 PM | Read comments (3) | Permalink

December 26

Santa Rant

In all truth, I don't mind being a party pooper sometimes. This time, I'm hoping rain falls on the Santa parade. It's easy to argue that Santa and all that he represents detracts from the reason Christmas is supposed to be about, but what bugs me more about it is the hypocrisy we exhibit in supporting his existence. I suppose the same goes for Easter Bunnies and Tooth Fairies, but most parents teach their children not to lie, and then they go and tell their kids that these characters exist knowing full well that they don't. Now, I don't know very many people that were traumatized by finding out that Santa doesn't really exist or that don't trust people because their parents lied to them about these characters. The consequences are not necessarily negative, but I don't know that lying is justified regardless of the consequences--and it's lying on a very large scale, on a societal level! So I haven't really developed this theory very much; maybe this isn't really as bad as I think. Just a thought that has been running through my mind lately with the Christmas season upon us.

4:04 PM | Permalink | Philosophy

December 23

How to lose your Job Twice in One Year

Well,I really haven't succeeded in the job market this year. It has been a learning experience for me, not just what I've learned about other people, but also what I've learned about myself.

I've learned that I have a strong personality, that I don't allow myself to be walked over when I see unethical practices going on. If there is an injustice, such as in the last place I worked, I will fight for the person against whom the injustice was committed if that person is not given the voice that he/she deserves. My reputation is not important. If I lose my job because of something I did wrong, then I have myself to blame, but if I lose my job because I was not afraid to stand up for the right reasons, then it's worth it. The last time, it was really gossip and labelling that contributed to conflict in my workplace. This time, there was a more serious case, which is probably best left unmentioned in a public forum such as this, but in this case, instead of helping a person that had some inappropriate things inflicted on her, the people that should have been helping her and standing up for her were only concerned about themselves and trying to protect their own names and reputations. The old boys' club still sticks together.

The unfortunate reality is that I think these things go on a lot more than we think, but in what job does your own assertiveness and 0-tolerance for truly unjust and unethical practices at work serve as an asset rather than a trait that could get you fired? And that doesn't mean protesting outside people's offices, sending around nasty emails to co-workers about everything you disagree with or anything like that, but simply standing up to the people committing those acts, whether that means facing them personally or going to a higher authority that actually would have the power to make sure those practices are no longer continued. If I thought long enough about it, I might even be inspired to take up law and become a human rights lawyer. I am so fascinated by the topic, but at the same time, would it be the most effective way to impact the human spirit, to bring about real change in people's hearts enough that they would convict themselves of their own wrongdoing and want to change their own lives? I have never known this to be the case. The bad guy often seems to win, but my satisfaction in the case of my last job is knowing that as much as they think they've got rid of all the problem people, it's the problem people that are left, and they will start to turn on each other when they realise that things still aren't working right. At least that has been my observation in other "gang-like" groupings.

I've noticed that the readership of my blog went quite downhill during the last month. Between starting my new job and my laptop dying, I had little time to write anything here. But for any of you out there reading this, will you dare to examine all sides of a situation, and if there is just cause, would you be willing to put yourselves on the line for yourself or someone else? I don't believe it's always a good idea to make a big stink about everything, but as Canadians especially, we tend to be so apathetic that we rarely take a stand on anything. May we be instilled with a deep sense of what is right and wrong, and may we be willing to live steadfastly by those principles. I know I could never feel like I had any integrity if I tried to live any other way.

11:00 AM | Permalink

December 16

Long Way Home

A brief update, for those of you that check here in some sort of regular fashion. I started my new job and am soon planning to quit it for various reasons. It has been taking up a lot of my life recently, and that combined with the fact that my laptop died last weekend and is now getting repaired, I haven't been on the Internet much to be putting any updates here. Hope you haven't missed me too much :o)

3:06 PM | Read comments (1) | Permalink

October/November 2006 posts

November 22

Utilising or using the word succinct?

I am actually trying to make two statements here about two different and unrelated words. When I worked for the government, I took a course in Plain Language, a movement you can read about easily on the Internet if you Google it. I generally agree with what the Plain Language movement advocates, but there is one word that I am now convicted to defend, and that is the word "utilise." Since taking that course and learning about trying to eliminate unnecessary words from the English language, like utilise, I have been trying to substitute "use" for "utilise" every time. I've arrived at the point where I think utilise actually has its own purpose that maybe it is just used in the wrong places many times. There were some times when "use" just didn't seem to be as appropriate as "utilise" depending on the concept. It seems to me that although its meaning may be thought to be the same as for the word "use," it has a different connotation. If I utilise something, I think I make use of it, which seems to encompass more than if I simply use it. Indeed, even the Oxford English dictionary indicates this. It defines the verb utilise as to make practical and effective use of. Of the word "use" where Plain Language proponents would argue that it can replace utilise, the OED defines use as to take, hold, or deploy as a means of achieving something. In an extreme example, I perchance use my computer, but I do not really utilise it. That is to say I use to achieve some ends, but I don't really utilise it all the time. I don't use it as effectively as I could for various reasons, such as I didn't read the instruction book, or I'm too daft to figure out the programming aspects of it or some such thing. Maybe it's just me, but I think that utilise definitely has its own place in the English lexicon.

As for succinct, my comment only has to do with the ironic way it in which people use it. I first heard the word from one of my anthropology professors, who used it in one of his classes. He often used vocabulary I didn't know, so I would write them down and look them up. I instantly loved the word succinct. Not only is it a word that has aesthetic appeal to me, but it also has a great meaning. It sounds better than using brief or concise all the time. I like having options :o) But what I've been noticing a lot lately, for some reason, is that people will say something like: "It's nice and short, succinct, and to the point." The word succinct alone would suffice to mean the same thing. It's nice and succinct. By saying short and to the point, it's just being redundant, and in no way, is the statement in itself succinct. I guess the true irony would be in stating the word succinct is short, brief, succinct, and to the point. But I just find it a funny statement when people are so redundant with that particular word.

10:11 PM | Permalink | English Language

November 15

The Restaurant Queen

Or so I used to be called at one point in my life. I am often at a loss as to what to write about here, but I remembered that people often ask my advice about restaurants. Now that I have my own site, I thought, why not add my own list of favourite restaurants? To those of you in Edmonton, I hope you find this useful.

12:33 PM | Permalink

November 14

Remembering the fallen

On Saturday, November 11, we marked Remembrance Day (Veterans' Day in the US). This date was chosen based on the declaration of peace and the cessation of hostilities of the First World War, on the 11th hour of the 11th day of the 11th month. I would not go so far as to say I'm on a crusade to have our current generation respect and understand the significance of this day, but I know when I was growing up, I felt that my own generation did not understand the importance of Remembrance Day because we had never known war. Our dads would not have fought in any war (the most recent that Canada was involved in would have been the Korean War), and we certainly had no war to face when we graduated from high school or university. With our soldiers now in Afghanistan (and some of them dying), this has all changed. We not only have reason to remember what soldiers did for us a long time ago, we have fallen soldiers to appreciate now.

My appreciation always stemmed from my grandpa's experience fighting in WW2. It was something he rarely talked about, except for the funny anecdotes, but twice in my life, I had the chance to hear him tell me about him getting captured by the Germans and about his only full blood brother getting killed and leaving behind a wife and child he never met. It's the latter story that caused me to see my grandpa cry for the one and only time in my life, and I tried to imagine how it would be if I had been in the same situation, how I might feel. So on Remembrance Day, even if I don't know any other veterans, I remember my grandpa and what he went through.

My cousin mentioned the other day that there are now white poppies people can buy to protest war. The red poppies are used in the UK, if not France and Belgium, as well as Canada, to mark the poppies that grew over the graves of thousands of soldiers buried in Flanders Fields in Belgium. Now, people are trying to protest war by encouraging people to wear white ones instead. Well, I'm not a proponent of war; I certainly won't be the first in line if suddenly they need a bunch of volunteers, but I think that while you may not agree with war, you can still support our troops, past and present. The reality is that there are guys over in Afghanistan now, and their friends are falling. Whether or not it's for the right reasons, the white poppy will not make those dead people come back or ease the pain of those who lost someone. I don't know if the white poppy supporters intend any disrespect, but for me, even if I disagree with the war now, I still want to wear a red poppy to remember the guys from past wars. You can't tell me it was wrong to combat Hitler, who would surely have controlled a significant portion of Europe if not parts of other continents in the world, had someone not put a stop to it. What about remembering the sacrifice of those who fought in that war? I certainly do and plan to continue doing so in the future.

P.S. I realise this colour combination is not easy to read, but I wanted to use the combination of the red and black of our poppies.

5:34 PM | Permalink | News and politics

November 10

First Snow

OK, so the first snow was a while ago by now, but I still wanted to post a few photos. When the snow fell, most of the leaves were still on the trees, at least on our block, so our yard turned into this white blanket of snow with a miscellaneous pattern of brightly-coloured autumn leaves. It was quite a grey day when I took these photos, so the colour of the leaves doesn't really stand out the way I saw it, but it gives you an idea. And for those of you in Mexico that keep up to date with me, this is the type of winter I am used to: one where snow falls around the end of October, as was the case here, and stays around until the spring. I think we might manage that this year. We already have 14cm of snow, and the forecast for tonight calls for more snow yet, perhaps another 1-3cm, while I heavily dislike the driving conditions the snow creates, it helps me to know that global warming--and El Nino this year, for that matter--haven't quite got a complete grip on us yet. And I'm sure that farmers are pretty happy about the snow cover, assuming they have in the rural areas the snow we have in the city. I am not fond of the cold, but I am happy to see that we are having a normal winter so far.

I also would like to point out that I've added some photos, as I said I would before, to the Harvest Glory album. I took these photos when I went out for a walk one day. I wanted to discover some of the river valley paths going through my area that I had so far never walked before, and I wanted to do it while the trees were still in their harvest glory. One of my most favourite sights is seeing the brilliant fall colour contrasted with the bright blue, afternoon sky. It's like nature knows how to match colours without any instruction from artists or style gurus. It's one of the things I've noticed that I love about the prairies at harvest time, seeing the golden yellow of a crop of barley, wheat, or oats, or a bright yellow field of canola against a blue sky for as far as the eye can see. In my opinion, it is unmatched. Back to my walk that day, though, I have one photo in there of the stairs I took to get to the path. It seemed to me that they led into a dark abyss, and as I had no idea where they really led, I was a little concerned. I learned after that my biggest concern would be getting back up them as there are over 100 steps, about 134 of them. Yikes!

10:57 PM | Permalink

November 07

Magical Muffins

I've been baking a lot lately. OK, it hasn't been quite a storm yet, but relative to the amount that I normally bake, I think I've been producing a lot. I've baked 2 batches of muffins and one black forest cake in the last 3 weeks. I'm finding that I enjoy it a lot--and of course, it produces tasty results. If you're in the market for a great chocolate cake recipe, let me know, and I'll forward it to you. It's a nice, dense, but not too rich cake; just the way I like it! The muffins are just great. The whole concept of the muffin is great, though. I mean, here you have a tasty food that can contain all kinds of healthy stuff in it, like nuts, fruit, dairy, fibre, and whole grains. I feel like just baking a lot of muffins all the time. I think if I had my own business, I wouldn't mind having a bakery. That would be cool, although it might be a fattening job!

Outside of that, I finally have a new job. I'll be working with the (non-profit name removed due to potential legal implications), starting out as an admin assistant and working my way into something else. Some of my friends think I'm crazy, considering I had an opportunity to work at an IT company doing HR work for about $10,000 more per year, but that work would be boring for me, and I certainly wouldn't feel like I'm contributing to helping my society in some way. The people at the (unnamed) are super supportive and warm, and one of my friends already works there--Kelly, the one I visited in London and probably wrote about going to Tooting Broadway with, for those of you keeping up with the travel part of my blog. With Kelly there, I won't even have to worry about finding a lunch buddy!

12:52 PM | Read comments (1) | Permalink

October 20

Gray Matter

I have to use something bright today on this gray day. It is snowing outside, but it is wet snow, and the damp, cold weather has succeeded in doing nothing to improve my even grayer mood. Gray days are always reflective days for me, and today, I'm reflecting on job interviews.

I've started to realise that job interviews are like taking exams in school. I mean, they are obviously exams of a sort, but what reminds me of the exam process is the post-interview period. Many people I knew could come out of an exam saying, "Yes! I aced it!" or "I'm pretty sure I didn't do very well." In my case, whenever I thought I had done well, I did poorly, and when I thought I hadn't done well, I ended up scoring high. I got to the point where I would come out of an exam having no idea how I really did, realising that I only really knew the answers to two-thirds or 75% of the questions. The only times I really had a good idea if I did well was if I had an essay in place of an exam. Then I could guarantee myself a good grade most of the time. What I've come to learn about myself is that I excel in writing and that I don't think in multiple-choice ways or succeed in impromptu speaking on subjects about which I know very little or am unprepared to speak. Writing helps me to organise my thoughts and beliefs, whether I write them in the form of an essay, story, email, or poem. I had another interview this morning, this one with the Faculty of Nursing, and I really cannot gauge how it went. They are looking for strong writers, and while I am, I haven't any publications outside my master's thesis to prove it.

Back when I wrote the Graduate Records Examination in order to apply to several different grad schools, my analytical score (basically doing logic problems) was my highest score, where I appeared in the 85th percentile, and my verbal skills were the lowest at about the 60th or 65th percentile. I was so dismayed because even when my grammar abilities were worse, I was still considered to be a local grammar guru to many people I knew. The verbal section really caught me on the vocabulary section, where I had to state the antonym to words like "bucolic", which, according the Educational Testing Service, is a word that everyone with a Bachelor's degree would know. It started me thinking that maybe I express myself in ways that are more abstract or harder to quantify. I love texture and timbre, pitch and posey, shape and shade, and hue upon hue. Maybe that is the reason why I excel in the creative arts the most.

I'm having a hard time trying to figure out how to advertise myself as a proofreader to make some extra money while I'm looking for a job, but maybe what I'll start doing is finishing up a few paintings, posting them on my blog, and hope that some stranger will see them and want to buy one. Let me tax your gray matter no longer with my drivel!

8:52 AM | Permalink

October 14

Real Autumn Beauty

It excites me that there are people I don't even know that read my blog, and I invite you to please leave comments--nice ones hopefully--to let me know if you enjoyed passing through my world. It surprises me that my life would interest enough of my own friends and family let alone complete strangers, but it doesn't upset me, that's for sure! I was even happy to see someone hit my site because they searched for Maltbie Davenport Babcock--a far cry from those people that were directed to my site by looking for X-rated material!

Not a whole lot to report on in the last week or so. Last weekend continued to have odd events occurring, but not as many on one day as what happened last Friday. It was bizarre. For those of you on my msn, you may have noticed my comment about going to jail, and that's because I may be starting work in Edmonton's federal prison for women. The only problem is that we don't know when it will start because the project (meaning funding) is still awaiting approval, so I may still be incomeless for a while.

Outside of that there is little to amuse you in my life at the moment. The main reason I leave a message today is to point out some fall pictures I took and wanted to share with you. The colour is brilliant, but photos cannot capture the almost golden glow that seems to emanate from the centre of the trees. My best friend Angela wrote on her blog that it seemed to her that the colours were more brilliant this year, and I had independently thought the same thing, so maybe it's not just our own perceptions. I have more pictures that are still on my camera, but I'll post some of the ones I have for now. They were taken around my university and around the area where I live.

4:08 PM | Read comments (1) | Permalink

October 06

A Series of Unfortunate Events (no Lemony Snicket involved)

I can't say that everything went wrong today, but enough things did--and then they didn't--to make it a very strange day. First of all, I was sleeping at this lady's house last night (too long of a story for those of you that don't already know who this is), and when I came home this morning, I was supposed to find an empty house, save for my roommate's brother, who would have been fast asleep in his own bed in the basement suite of the house. Kelly's 7am flight would almost have reached her Kelowna destination. Well, when I came home, her bro was definitely sleeping, but it was because he had no reason to wake up to take her to the airport. Kelly herself appeared out of her room! Through an alarm clock error, she slept in and missed her flight. Little did I know that would be just the start of things.

Our gas metre used to be in our basement, so the City of Edmonton guys were supposed to come out at 11am today to change it to an outside metre, meaning the gas guy wouldn't require anyone to be home to come and read the metre. Well, crews showed up around 8am. Not that I mind it when they come earlier than later, especially as this meant they would be gone before I had to leave for my lunch date today, but as a result of their arrival, our nosey neighbour phoned us up at 8:15am to see why all these people were there, despite the fact that she had the same work done to her gas metre earlier in the summer! I also couldn't shower because they had turned off the gas, meaning there would be no hot water.

A short while later, Kelly left to the airport just to see if she could get on the next flight out as a standby passenger. I decided to get some work done, put in a few resumes, email my lunch date today to decide where to meet, and all those sorts of good things. I get to my computer, and the Internet isn't working! I couldn't figure out what happened! Then I remembered that Telus (the phone company, for those of you from out of province/country) had sent us an upgraded modem, and it was sitting at the post office ready for pickup, so off I went to retrieve it. When I got it home, I started trying to set it up, but it turned out I needed the Telus username and password for the Telus account, and I had no idea what that was since the account is in the landlady's name, and she happens to live in BC! I knew Kelly would be able to work it out, except that she might be on her way to Kelowna, which would mean I would have no access to the Internet until she came back. How I depend on my Internet these days; it's sad, no? Well, I needed to cancel lunch with my friend for sure, but I didn't even have a phone number for her. She has recently started her job, and she has been having problems with her work number not functioning, so we had only been in email contact. So what to do. I phoned Mom (always a good idea when you're in trouble!)

Mom emailed my friend for me with my phone number so she could call me and hopefully make a plan for a postponed lunch. Then she suggested I go to her house and shower and use the Internet there. So that was the plan when Kelly appeared at home again. I guess there were so many people already on standby that there was no chance for her, and being that it is the Thanksgiving long weekend, flights were booked solid the whole weekend.

Kelly started trying to get the modem hooked up, but when she unpacked her laptop, it was almost too hot to touch, and it wouldn't turn on, even though it had been off since last night. We still don't know what happened. At a last attempt for help, she decided to call Telus, thinking we could at least set up the Internet on my laptop, but the phone wouldn't even work! We found another phone to use, and then for some reason, her computer decided to work, and we were able to get Telus to help set up the modem. By that point, I still needed to shower and leave for an afternoon meeting, not to mention put in some resumes for jobs whose deadlines are today, so the day was crazy enough indeed.

My lunch date suggested all this may be on account of today's full moon, and she might be right!!! I've used black and orange on purpose to represent the spookiness we are experiencing this Halloween month! :o)

4:32 PM | Permalink